Surviving The Holidays After The Loss Of A Loved One

Surviving the holidays after the loss of a loved can be extremely hard; Almost unbearable for many.  I know for myself, it is truly a difficult time, but I am learning to deal with it and cope using many techniques I learned in Grief Counseling.

My husband passed away 5 years ago while talking to me over the telephone.  He passed away on my birthday as we were making plans for an exciting weekend.

He was a truck driver and was actually driving down the interstate going to pick up another load of sand.  While talking to me on his bluetooth, he suffered a massive heart attack and passed way in his 18 wheeler.

I was absolutely devastated when the State Troopers rang my doorbell and presented me with the news that would absolutely change my life forever and send me into a deep, dark state of depression.

Grief Counseling truly helped me deal with his loss and also recovered & restored the soul that died in me.

What helped me along my journey are three of the following:

  1. I opened up and talked to family and friends.
  2. I finally allowed family members and friends to do something kind for me.
  3. Taking one foot and placing it in front of the other, I was able to go out to dinner and a movie.
  4. I am now able to be around other couples, as it was too difficult before and I would decline to attend events with friends who were a couple not wanting to feel like a third wheel.
  5.  Therapy helped me to stop feeling guilty about smiling again, laughing again, dancing again or just reminiscing about my husband and the memories we shared and created during the holidays.

This holiday season, I am decorating again,  cooking the Christmas meal.  I am baking with my sweet grandchildren;  but most of all, I am learning to love me again and appreciate the time I have with family.  We can’t do anything about DEATH.  This is something that is going to happen regardless, but we can learn to deal with it and manage the pain and continue to shine a light on others hurting and struggling.

The pain of losing someone we love is very real, but the important thing is, we were given the great opportunity to love them and one day we shall see them again.